The Power of Claiming Your Story

By Richard Reeve

For many that enter the world of recovery, one early hurdle that begins to loom in the not-so-distant future is the need to get up before a group of others in recovery and share “what it was like, what happened, and what it’s like now.”  Also known as sharing one’s experience, strength and hope, the practice of telling ones story has a surprising curative effect on the individual.

A new report on resilience in troubled teens likewise finds value in the individuals ability to construct and share a personal narrative:

“… it shows the personal narratives we all engage in as ongoing acts of sense-making, as sources of renewal and growth. Potentially exciting, too, in this study of resilient teens is the new slant we can take on the so-called talking cure. The curative powers come not from an expert who claims to hold the master key to interpretation, as in psychoanalytic theory, but from honing the skills of reflection and understanding and revision.”

The ability to frame one’s experience before and throughout a student’s stay at The Family Foundation School has always been a vital task which culminates in the graduation speech.  The therapeutic value of the task, which for many of the students is quite formidable, is certainly variable.  While some students will will approach the task with a level of dishonesty, and others with a lack of specifics, many will seize the opportunity to claim the benefits of owning their story.

It will be useful for our community to consider these questions when working with students that are coming to terms with expressing their experience, strength and hope.

“…those who were able to process difficult material had richer and smoother narratives. They came to realize that the significant questions to ask were: Does a speaker stick to generalizations, or can she see nuance within a situation? Is a story flexible and inclusive, or closed and static? Does the speaker welcome opportunities for change, or resist them? Are relationships tolerated, recruited, or rejected as threats? Can a speaker focus on emotionally taxing experiencing with vagueness, avoidance, confusion or changing the subject? Does the speaker see herself as a force in the plotline, or a bystander? Dr. Terry Apter, Resilience in Troubled Teens

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