As we grow and live our lives, trying to make sense of our emotions, one above others often dominates. This emotion, simply summed up as fear, is a driving force guiding our actions. This emotion is so strong, it often misleads us into using other emotions to mask its presence. Emotions such as anger and depression, are often a product of an underlying fear, which becomes invisible through the cover up.
Often times because of fear we try to control other people’s lives. We do this, thinking that if we control our lives with a strong grip, fear cannot surprise us. Other times we become an “approval seeker” content with others controlling our lives. This often ends up with us blaming others when things don’t go our way. We end up having unrealistic expectations of their responsibility for us, and therefore set ourselves up for disappointment.
On other occasions, we hide from our fear turning to other things. We live our day becoming non-committal, paralyzed, afraid of making an incorrect choice, afraid of failing. We than have ‘an out’ when things backfire, fooling ourselves that we are ok because ‘we never made a choice’. Still other times, we rush blindly ahead oblivious to our surroundings – in an attempt to focus on something else.
Still other times we end up turning towards alcohol or drugs to ‘forget’ about our fears. This action is temporary, and often creates a host of other problems. These problems help hide our original fears and even cause others to manifest.
Unfortunately, fear is a part of who we are and no matter what we do or where we go, it remains, unresolved and normally building up its power over us the longer we ignore it.
We do not have to let fear control us though. We can learn to face our fears with faith and friendship. Remembering that we are not alone in our feelings, and while we do not want to control or be controlled by others, we can use our friends for support and guidance when we are lost in our fears.
